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Ode to a Newsie


"Ode to a Newsie"
to the tune of "Carrying the Banner"
by Antranig/Anna

I don't remember when it started--
A couple weeks ago, I think.
He seemed so sweet and tender-hearted,
And he just HAD to be in pink.
He's got a smile as sweet as candy.
It sparkles brighter than a star.
Those Converse shoes must come in handy
When running from a speeding car.
My true love is never ending;
My sense of pride long gone.
I'm obsessed, I'm not pretending.
Armenians turn me on!
It's a fine life,
Loving Michael Goorjian 'til I blows;
A mighty fine life,
Cooing at his face, his hair, his clothes.
Love him so much,
It's not even funny.
Want him for my honey,
Not JUST for his money.
It's a fine life,
Stalking Michael everywhere he goes!
You must admit, he's quite a hottie.
And wow, he sure knows how to sing!
He's even got a gorgeous body.
I told you, he has everything!
Michael's face is such a beauty,
Eyes so bright they shine.
All in all, a real cutie.
Wish that he were mine!
It's a fine life,
Looking into those sweet, soft brown eyes.
A mighty fine life,
Loving every square knot that he ties.
You can find me,
Lost in desperation,
Slipping towards starvation,
Filled with adoration
For a certain
Hot guy who wears pink and never dies!
Though you're more than
Two times my age,
We'll be engaged.
When I saw you,
I fell in love.
Since then,
It's you
I'm dreaming of!
If he weren't so pretty,
I might not be giddy
Or at least not completely smitten.
If I had ignored him,
I wouldn't have adored him
And this song wouldn't have been written.
He's not always cheery,
But he's such a dearie.
He may not be perfect but he's close as he can be.
Others might not love him
Some may not know of him
But he looks pretty good to me!
Whether he's Skitt or Bob or Henry,
He always leaves me mesmerized.
It isn't too long before I see
I gave in without resistance,
And never thought it odd.
Seems to me like his existence
Proves that there's a God.
It's a fine life,
Watching every movie that he's in.
A mighty fine life,
Being so obsessed, it feels like sin.
Someone tell him
He's earned my devotion,
Set my world in motion,
Stirred my deep emotion.
It's a fine life,
Loving Michael Goorjian.
It's a fine life,
Loving Michael Goorjian.
It's a fine life,
Loving Michael Goorjian.
It's a fine life,
Loving Michael Goorjian.
He's so

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